YUS NEW TRAILER!  Shiney and more graphic than this sissy girl of a trailer.

NSFW for those of you who want world peace.

I don’t know what it is with the recent news on penis related news… I apologize in advance.

“A KAZAKH man cut off his penis at Madrid’s Barajas airport to avoid being extradited home and was taken to hospital in a serious condition, Spanish media reported today.”

I don’t know why he thought of specifically cutting his penis, but his devious plan to avoid deportation worked.

I’m certain that pictures aren’t necessary for this particular post…. you’re welcome.

Read the full story HURRRRR

It has now been proven that the mere sight of a man’s wanger is enough to terrify a thief into abandoning his mission.

“Mr Stuart ran outside, opened the passenger door and sat beside the thief – not realising he had forgotten to get dressed.

As soon as the thief saw Stuart, he flung the door open and made a run for it.”

Read the whole story here

…What? You’re not a fan of dinosaurs? Maybe a Hipster Hitler is more up your lane!

Click here for the full post

Not much more to say as the title describes exactly the purpose of this website – the retardedness and douchebaggery of some people in this world.  Fortunately, we get to laugh at these helpless victims as they begin to deal with these “Clients From Hell”.

Client: “I googled my name and there is some nasty stuff about me on the Internet. There is this guy saying in his blog that I am an idiot. I want you to remove that blog and block the Internet if they write shit about me.”

Us: “We cannot do that.”

Client: “Well, get someone else to do it then. I want every nasty stuff about me removed from the Internet today, and make sure nobody can write bad things about me. I want you to control the Internet.”

Us: “We can’t control it and neither can you.”

Client: “Right, if you won’t do it I’ll find someone who will.”

Us: “Good luck, let us know if you succeed.”

CEO: ”Hi Michael, we wanted to talk to you in person (over the phone) to resolve the question of payment.”

Me: “OK.”

CEO: ”Let’s forget all of the stuff that has gone on in the past with this project. Let me put {Accountant) on the phone.”

Accountant: ”What we’d like to do is offer to pay $XXX for the project. Based on what you billed us we think $XXX is a fair amount, minus what we’ve already paid you, minus the recruiter fee.”

Me: “So you’re ‘offering’ to pay me half of what is still owed on the bill for the work you hired me to do.”

Accountant: ”Well, based on the total cost we’re willing to pay, minus the recruiter fee…”

Me: ”A simple yes or no, will suffice. If you owe me $XXXX and are ‘willing’ to pay $XXX, if my math is correct, and I believe it is, I can redo it on my calculator if you’d like, you’re ‘willing’ to pay me half. Even though I rushed the work and everyone was thrilled with it.”

CEO: ”Well… yes, I guess, you could say that is half…”

Me: ”I do.”

CEO: ”Look, I’m sure you just want to put this behind you…”

Me: ”Actually, no. I want to be paid in full.”

CEO: ”Well, this is all we’re willing to pay.”

Me: “You know you signed a contract right?”

Accountant: “Well, we had several conversations via email and in person about this…”

Me: ”Yes, in each you tried to weasel you’re way out of paying me…”

CEO: ”I think this is a fair compromise.”

Me: ”I think you’ll be hearing from my lawyers.”

Ozzy Osbourne is known for having amazing guitarists in his bands, from Tony Iommi to Randy Rhoads, and now with 10 year old Yuto Miyazawa. He was also named the worlds youngest professional guitarist by Guinness in 2008. Yuto joined Ozzy on stage at Ozzfest to perform Crazy Train and totally destroys it, seriously. Look for this kid in five or ten years, he will be the next guitar god, I’m calling it.

Oh there’s a video for your viewing pleasure, make sure you watch the solo it’s pretty amazing.

There has been a lot of controversy around Rolling Stone’s True Blood cover for the September issue – featuring the stars Alexander Skarsgard, Anna Paquin, and Stephen Moyer completely naked.

:O  I know right?  But before you complain about the lack of boobies, what you probably didn’t hear about was that their originally planned cover was immediately rejected.

Enjoy the rest of your weekend :)

Amazing movie? I think not.